What a year...

So I didn't realize that it's been so long since I was last on here. This past year has been crazy! I went back to school in January to get my GED. I'm so happy I'm doing it. I'm sure it would have made it alot easier for me to have gotten it before having kids or never quitting school would have helped as well. But never the less, I'm getting it now and it feels great.

In December of this year I am going to start college at Ivy Tech. I will be majoring in Criminal Justice doing social work. But not sure what part of the social work field I will be doing.

Brantson also had his 2nd. birthday in January. We didn't have anything really big since it was in the middle of winter and the weather was TERRIBLE! But Rob and I made sure we made it extra special for him. It's hard to believe that in just "5" months it's going to be a new year and he will be turning 3!

In March Rob and I finally got to go on our honeymoon...I know 3 years later, but atleast we finally got one. We went to Las Vegas for a whole week. We had such a blast. We are wanting to go back atleast one more time. But we also celebrated our birthdays at the same time too! But I must say March has got to be the worst month for me..EVER! I lost my grandmother while we were on vacation, a day before we were to come home. When my phone rang at 7 in the morning vegas time, so 10 am here and I heard my dads voice and just by the way he said my name I knew what happend. He appologized greatly for calling me and telling me while we were on vacation. I tried to enjoy that last full day there, but all I could think about was wanting to be home. But we made the best of it. She was so dear to me. I can not go a day without thinking about her. I visit her grave almost on a daily basis and I can feel her presence with me almost everywhere I go. But I know she is no longer in any kind of pain and she can now walk among the heavens happy and is with the loved ones she lost over the years. The day after her funeral I also lost my grandpa. He had been fighting cancer for a couple of years until he finally gave up. And even though I miss him just as much, I have to remind myself that it would only be selfish for me to wish either one of them was still here knowing what kind of pain they had to go through on a daily basis just to survive. I also feel him with me. On some days I almost think I see them. On saturday Rob and I went fishing, just the 2 of us. That was one of my grandpas favorite pass time hobbies. And while we were out in the middle of the lake, I looked over my shoulder only to see a man standing there. I didn't see a face or anything, it was a dark, black shadow figure. But I only saw it for a second because when I took a double look he was gone. It litterally sent chills through my whole body. I almost have to think it was him. My kids hardly got to see him when he was at home because his wife refused to let anyone over to see him except her kids a few select others. I would visit him when he was in the hospital because she NEVER spent anytime there with him, she always left him alone so I felt that was the only way my kids would get to know him. Brantson was only allowed in his room because Rhylea was still just an infant. He only got to see him a few times but it was enough for my grandpa. Shortly after he passed away, I found Brantson playing peek a boo in Rhylea's room and when I asked him who he was playing with he said grandpa. So I looked in the room, her light was off, the only light was the light coming in from outside off the street lamps and I didn't see anyone, it was completely dark in her room. Then all of a sudden Brantson burst out in laughter and that was the end of it. Again, I have to think my grandpa was with us then.

June made a year since Rob and I bought our house. We love it. It's hard to believe that a year has already come and gone, but we have made more than enough memories here in the short time to last a life time. June also was a time for celebrating Rhylea's 1st. birthday. AGAIN I can't believe where the time has gone. She's getting so big, too fast. I wasn't able to keep up with her and all her new achievments in her baby book. As soon as she would learn one thing she was starting something new. She's been cutting teeth left and right. she went from rolling, to crawling, pulling up and walking all with in a matter of a few months. She is starting to say MANY more words now. I think it helps her hear us talk to Brantson "normal" because we still talk to her in a "baby" voice. Her and Brantson just adore each other. And it's been that way almost from the very begining.

And it brings us to now. It is August already. On the 12th. made 4 years since Rob and I first started dating. We weren't sure if we're still supposed to count that as an anniversary and celebrate it or if we have to wait till our wedding anniversary, which is only next month. So I bought him something small. We haven't decided yet on what we are going to do for our anniversary if we do anything at all. We know we need our time away from the kids to spend together, but we hate doing anything that doesn't involve them! They are all we can think and talk about when it's just the 2 of us.

Speaking of kids...I've always said I want a BIG family. We have been talking about having more kids, but not anytime soon. Maybe another year and a half before we even think about trying. But it seems as each day passes that I spend with Brantson and Rhylea, I'm not so sure if I really want anymore. It almost feels like having a 3rd. would just throw off the balance of our little family. And maybe that's God's way of telling me not to have anymore. I like where we're at in our life and as much as I want to have more kids, I can't see us having more.